Spam Lampoon of the Day
This isn't the usual subject line.... it's the text within the spam that will be the object of today's ridicule. 9999 times out of 10,000 I don't open spam. But for some reason, my soul called out to me to open this one. I'm glad I did. It was SO worth it. The random nature of the text is delicious... I love random, and this was obviously done by one of those random sentence generators... enjoy:
Another infected Chainsaw
An incinerated stovepipe ruminates, because a line dancer pees on a fighter pilot defined by an apartment building. A ball bearing feels nagging remorse, and a radioactive buzzard goes to sleep; however, a feline squid learns a hard lesson from a sheriff. Now and then, the stovepipe related to another demon knows a somewhat fashionable cab driver. The cashier flies into a rage, but another bullfrog for the senator barely recognizes the lazily self-actualized hole puncher. iron fillings on Alpha Proxima. For a sperm whale. In fact and squelched at it dropped out of cows. - said Zaphod. - You want it. it swam sickeningly through the computer, the sound of book, was billowing out of to in Improbability Drive, - Well, maybe six, - said Arthur. The two to end? - Understand that! - A quick a small gold all lovingly made him towards one followed the murky depths. - The way see any... A computer screen a to be necessary, - or define,
Any fundraiser can find lice on another green industrial complex, but it takes a real bottle of beer to sanitize a briar patch toward a CEO. Some turkey can be kind to a shabby wedding dress. Now and then, a nation over a dust bunny plans an escape from a girl scout an almost paternal fire hydrant. A tornado can be kind to the turkey for the hole puncher. A hole puncher toward a fire hydrant competes with the paper napkin.
movement, clapped his reasons whose two-man crew of creation. Arthur blinked at it would have. Chapter 9 Plural Z finally to make it were screaming through the air with life, of the conversation, having merely had become it one poetry at that they become economists, its... - he was like to build another drear morning Arthur Dent's house got problems. Arthur once off a single of something. - said Ford ignored to the only archipelago of paper, which contained her again. There.
(end of spam)
There are several things about this that make me laugh... overall, this sort of random junk is right up my alley. Back in the pre-internet day when you had to have your modem dial into a specific BBS in order to post on a forum (as opposed to logging in to the internet and having them ALL at your disposal) my friends and I used to write an ongoing story that was nothing but random junk like this, and it always made me chuckle.
Specifically: First - the first line 'another infected chainsaw' immediately got me laughing... as if the writer was continually beset with infected chainsaws, which constantly ruined his/her day. Second, the sentence about "any fundraiser can find lice on another green industrial complex" made me guffaw, and started an uncontrollable cascade of laughter. Third: the numerous references to Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy added to the hillarity - that's one of my favorite series of books, one of the funniest things ever written in my opinion. Fourth, the line "Arthur Dent's house got problems" just about made me pee my pants and successfully expelled every molecule of air out of my lungs. For anyone who has read the books or seen the movie, you know that that line is a hillarious understatement. Lastly, the point at which I lost consciousness and inverted my lung was the last word.... ending with "there." was the last straw... my lungs, already empty from laughter were completely ejected from my chest cavity upon reading of that declarative.
Speaking of damned funny stuff... I saw something on TV that just about killed me the other day, it's the funniest thing I've seen on TV in a long time (other than Robot Chicken) ... it was on 30 Rock, which is Tina Fey's new show. I'll start by saying that I find Tina to be Uber sexy - she's smart and hillarious in addition to being physically appealing. So I don't quite understand the bits on her show about her not being appealing. On this week's show, she was convinced by one of her employees to wear a slutty 'sexy' dress... and when she walked into the writer's meeting they all reacted with disgust, and one writer in particular (who is the type that most likely has never had consensual sex with a woman that wasn't paid for) had a look of obvious horror on his face, and yelled 'You're making me GAY!' Not sure why that made me laugh so hard that I missed the next two minutes of the show... but it did. Thank you, DVR.
Another infected Chainsaw
An incinerated stovepipe ruminates, because a line dancer pees on a fighter pilot defined by an apartment building. A ball bearing feels nagging remorse, and a radioactive buzzard goes to sleep; however, a feline squid learns a hard lesson from a sheriff. Now and then, the stovepipe related to another demon knows a somewhat fashionable cab driver. The cashier flies into a rage, but another bullfrog for the senator barely recognizes the lazily self-actualized hole puncher. iron fillings on Alpha Proxima. For a sperm whale. In fact and squelched at it dropped out of cows. - said Zaphod. - You want it. it swam sickeningly through the computer, the sound of book, was billowing out of to in Improbability Drive, - Well, maybe six, - said Arthur. The two to end? - Understand that! - A quick a small gold all lovingly made him towards one followed the murky depths. - The way see any... A computer screen a to be necessary, - or define,
Any fundraiser can find lice on another green industrial complex, but it takes a real bottle of beer to sanitize a briar patch toward a CEO. Some turkey can be kind to a shabby wedding dress. Now and then, a nation over a dust bunny plans an escape from a girl scout an almost paternal fire hydrant. A tornado can be kind to the turkey for the hole puncher. A hole puncher toward a fire hydrant competes with the paper napkin.
movement, clapped his reasons whose two-man crew of creation. Arthur blinked at it would have. Chapter 9 Plural Z finally to make it were screaming through the air with life, of the conversation, having merely had become it one poetry at that they become economists, its... - he was like to build another drear morning Arthur Dent's house got problems. Arthur once off a single of something. - said Ford ignored to the only archipelago of paper, which contained her again. There.
(end of spam)
There are several things about this that make me laugh... overall, this sort of random junk is right up my alley. Back in the pre-internet day when you had to have your modem dial into a specific BBS in order to post on a forum (as opposed to logging in to the internet and having them ALL at your disposal) my friends and I used to write an ongoing story that was nothing but random junk like this, and it always made me chuckle.
Specifically: First - the first line 'another infected chainsaw' immediately got me laughing... as if the writer was continually beset with infected chainsaws, which constantly ruined his/her day. Second, the sentence about "any fundraiser can find lice on another green industrial complex" made me guffaw, and started an uncontrollable cascade of laughter. Third: the numerous references to Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy added to the hillarity - that's one of my favorite series of books, one of the funniest things ever written in my opinion. Fourth, the line "Arthur Dent's house got problems" just about made me pee my pants and successfully expelled every molecule of air out of my lungs. For anyone who has read the books or seen the movie, you know that that line is a hillarious understatement. Lastly, the point at which I lost consciousness and inverted my lung was the last word.... ending with "there." was the last straw... my lungs, already empty from laughter were completely ejected from my chest cavity upon reading of that declarative.
Speaking of damned funny stuff... I saw something on TV that just about killed me the other day, it's the funniest thing I've seen on TV in a long time (other than Robot Chicken) ... it was on 30 Rock, which is Tina Fey's new show. I'll start by saying that I find Tina to be Uber sexy - she's smart and hillarious in addition to being physically appealing. So I don't quite understand the bits on her show about her not being appealing. On this week's show, she was convinced by one of her employees to wear a slutty 'sexy' dress... and when she walked into the writer's meeting they all reacted with disgust, and one writer in particular (who is the type that most likely has never had consensual sex with a woman that wasn't paid for) had a look of obvious horror on his face, and yelled 'You're making me GAY!' Not sure why that made me laugh so hard that I missed the next two minutes of the show... but it did. Thank you, DVR.
posted by Jeremy at 11/03/2006 05:43:00 PM
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